Revival
There was this girl I used to know in high school. Well, I didn't really know her, and she didn't really know me. But we knew OF each other; it's a small world in IB and even if you're not best friends with someone, you at least know a little bit about them through other people. There was one thing about this girl that if you knew her, you knew ABOUT her, and that was that she was a Christian. A really hardcore Christian who knew exactly what she believed and was not afraid to tell others when they were wrong. Our school (at least the IB students) had this online forum that everyone frequented, and one day someone started a thread entitled "which came first, the chicken or the egg"? Within about 3 posts it had turned into an evolution-versus-creation debate, that interestingly enough was still the hottest thread even until almost the end of the year.
This girl was a creationist. She absolutely tore into anyone and chewed them out if they believed in evolution. Now, maybe she was a little too...crazy about it, I don't know. You have to understand that back then, I wasn't a Christian so I just thought she was nuts. At this time she didn't have many arguments, and had a very childlike faith in that she knew what she believed and wasn't sure why except that she knew it was Truth. Which I guess was fair enough. Anyway, even though she didn't have the strongest arguments of any of the other creationists on that thread, she at least had a strong support network, and was asking other friends of hers for help and encouragements and rebuttals, etc. She clearly had a strong network of Christians around her to support her.
She wasn't one of those people you'd worry about when she started university.
People like that, though, are often the ones you have to worry about the most.
Yesterday I stumbled across her weblog while I was just randomly surfing around. I remembered that in high school she was usually pretty angry. Which is common of a lot of teenage girls (I was like that too at one point, after all). Anyway, in one of her recent entries she was talking about how much she had changed over the past year. As I read some of her older entries, I saw quite a transformation too. She wasn't constantly angry anymore. A lot of her entries were very positive. It seemed like she wasn't angry at the world anymore.
But then I read an entry that she wrote last August that made my heart drop. Now I'm not sure if this is plagiarism or not, but I'll put part of the entry up and link to it if you want to read the rest.
There's only so much about a person that you can learn from their weblogs. I looked at older entries to try and pinpoint the time when she started falling away from God, or to try and figure out what's been holding her back so that maybe I can talk to friends of mine who know her better than me to try and talk to her. But maybe it wasn't a simple turning point. Maybe it's something that's been building up for years.
How about this entry that another Christian friend of mine wrote a few months ago?
I've been thinking a lot about revival lately. In fact, sometimes it's all I can think about. Every week I find another couple people to pray revival for. And as I think about how God must feel, I'm reminded that how terrible I feel is nothing compared to how it is for Him. In an odd way, it fills me with exceeding joy to be preoccupied with the visions of friends of mine who are falling away. Not because they're falling away of course, but because it means I get a tiny glimpse of what it's like for God, and am reminded just how much work the Church has left to do in the hearts of people who have already placed their faith in Christ.
We all have a role to help those who are falling away from God, but the most important thing we can do is pray. I keep asking God for opportunities to talk to my friends, and He grants that a lot of the time. But when I get a chance to talk to them, I realize that there are some seriously thick walls built up around their hearts, and that I need to let God remove the rocks and till the soil if I ever hope to plant any seeds. He needs to speak to them if there's any hope that they'll come back to Him. And I do believe that all of the people I've talked about can come back to Him.
This girl was a creationist. She absolutely tore into anyone and chewed them out if they believed in evolution. Now, maybe she was a little too...crazy about it, I don't know. You have to understand that back then, I wasn't a Christian so I just thought she was nuts. At this time she didn't have many arguments, and had a very childlike faith in that she knew what she believed and wasn't sure why except that she knew it was Truth. Which I guess was fair enough. Anyway, even though she didn't have the strongest arguments of any of the other creationists on that thread, she at least had a strong support network, and was asking other friends of hers for help and encouragements and rebuttals, etc. She clearly had a strong network of Christians around her to support her.
She wasn't one of those people you'd worry about when she started university.
People like that, though, are often the ones you have to worry about the most.
Yesterday I stumbled across her weblog while I was just randomly surfing around. I remembered that in high school she was usually pretty angry. Which is common of a lot of teenage girls (I was like that too at one point, after all). Anyway, in one of her recent entries she was talking about how much she had changed over the past year. As I read some of her older entries, I saw quite a transformation too. She wasn't constantly angry anymore. A lot of her entries were very positive. It seemed like she wasn't angry at the world anymore.
But then I read an entry that she wrote last August that made my heart drop. Now I'm not sure if this is plagiarism or not, but I'll put part of the entry up and link to it if you want to read the rest.
The Bible is too grey. I no longer believe in deciphering black and white from grey... but rather, taking grey as it is.
I don't know if I can call myself a Christian anymore. Rather, I'll call myself a believer.
I have combined my Christianity with Taoism.
I am neither a Christian, nor a Taoist. I have my own religion. I will not let anyone TELL me what to believe. I will not let anyone TELL me what is right and wrong. Who are you to translate the grey into black and white?
-KarenIt was even more upsetting when I read the comments on that entry and realized there were people who agreed with her too.
There's only so much about a person that you can learn from their weblogs. I looked at older entries to try and pinpoint the time when she started falling away from God, or to try and figure out what's been holding her back so that maybe I can talk to friends of mine who know her better than me to try and talk to her. But maybe it wasn't a simple turning point. Maybe it's something that's been building up for years.
How about this entry that another Christian friend of mine wrote a few months ago?
As time goes on, i find myself drinking more often after work and wanting to go drinking more often in general.....why?? i have no clue....maybe its the calming effect it seems to have on me, or maybe its the sense of elation that comes with a couple pints....its just so good.....Or another friend of mine who wrote this a few years ago, and hasn't looked back since:
Shall I be a Christian then, or is this game too complex for one to join. The world is much different now, and perhaps... religion has faded or disintergrated throughout time... It is no longer an age of religion, but an age of practicality.I think the thing that bothers me the most (well, second-most) is that I really looked up to these people when I was seeking. To me they were the bastions of the faith and I wanted to learn from them about who God was. Seeing them fall away makes me feel...almost like a spiritual orphan.
Will I be damned for the slightest doubt about God? - Of course I would be... - I will also end up in Hell... if Hell does in fact exists....
"Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first."Sigh. Sometimes I'm so focused on evangelizing to people who I've never met who have never even heard of Christ that I forget to witness to people who do know Him. Sometimes in our rush to preach the Gospel to all nations, we overlook the people here, who maybe aren't as strong in their faith as we think they are.
- Revelation 2:4-5
"But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be witnesses to Me in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”Revival has to start here.
- Acts 1:8, NKJV
I've been thinking a lot about revival lately. In fact, sometimes it's all I can think about. Every week I find another couple people to pray revival for. And as I think about how God must feel, I'm reminded that how terrible I feel is nothing compared to how it is for Him. In an odd way, it fills me with exceeding joy to be preoccupied with the visions of friends of mine who are falling away. Not because they're falling away of course, but because it means I get a tiny glimpse of what it's like for God, and am reminded just how much work the Church has left to do in the hearts of people who have already placed their faith in Christ.
We all have a role to help those who are falling away from God, but the most important thing we can do is pray. I keep asking God for opportunities to talk to my friends, and He grants that a lot of the time. But when I get a chance to talk to them, I realize that there are some seriously thick walls built up around their hearts, and that I need to let God remove the rocks and till the soil if I ever hope to plant any seeds. He needs to speak to them if there's any hope that they'll come back to Him. And I do believe that all of the people I've talked about can come back to Him.
"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'
"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
- Luke 15:21-24
I think if I ever show signs on my blog of falling away you should post a comment with a link to this post.
It's true, isn't it? Our faith is so intertwined with our pride that we are the most fragile beings in existance. Sometimes I have no hope for the world. Then I read things like this and it makes me wish I could love people better.
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